For some people love is more than what you feel in the heart, it’s also about how well you deal with money.
Men today just like women are looking for someone who will complement their passion for frugal living.
Let’s not forget though that a healthy relationship takes more than just money. That means money is only one part of the relationship pie.
Back in 2012 I wrote a post asking whether frugal men were sexy and ever since then I’ve noticed quite a few visits to the blog where men were seeking advice about women. Yes there are men who want to date women who give some thought to their financial future.
It’s funny how easy it is to generalize one gender over the other but there are no comparisons as we are both equal. The problem is that most men and women don’t know where to start when looking for love as they age. The older we get the harder dating seems to be especially if a career and family comes first.
In our younger years we would go to the clubs dancing every weekend enjoying the night life but that quietly dwindles away. Those long nights of drunken fun for many are toned down to coffee shops, local pubs, museums, art exhibits, travelling and so on as the years pass by.
Some people say we look for love in all the wrong places and maybe so but these days protecting the heart is just as precious as protecting what you’ve got in your bank account. Not only are the men wanting to protect their gold but the women are on top of the money game as well.
It’s not uncommon to see women working in traditional roles that men would typically flock to such as fireman, police officer, mechanic and so on. Women can and want to earn their own money and rightfully so because an independent women relies on herself first. How many of you women out there have told yourself you will never rely on a man for money?
I don’t think there is anything wrong with that and I find that very appealing about a woman. She doesn’t have to earn big bucks but she has to have the drive to do something that she enjoys with her life.
When I moved to Canada I had no job and no Canadian education yet my wife and I were madly in love. She knew that I would find my way and I did. At first it was hard for a young guy like myself in a strange country but I gave it my all because I wanted to succeed.
I was very happy to learn that Mrs. CBB was passionate about saving money and her understanding about retirement and investing. I knew that I didn’t have to worry about her spending habits. I’m sure she felt the same way about me when she found out I loved personal finance.
Why is sexy so important when dating?
Well, the ‘sexy’ appeal is just as important to what is deep inside the heart. I’m pretty sure sex appeal is a driving force that brings two people together. It may be the eyes, hair or smile but something attracts you to sexy.
I had a guy email me about dating last week which is great because it’s not often men write in with relationship questions. I told him I’d touch on the topic because there seems to be a trend on Canadian Budget Binder of men wanting to know how to find frugal women who care about personal finance as much as they do.
Note: If you have a question you can email me or use the contact form on the blog to send me a very detailed question anonymously. The more detail the better I can address the situation for you. Not all questions will be featured on the blog but I will respond to them all personally at this time.
Finding true love
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I work-out at the gym daily and take care of myself and I’ve been told that I’m a handsome guy who loves life.
I’ve had enough of the dating scene and I’m tired of getting used and abused financially by these women I seem to fall for. I’m also tired of getting my heart broken. Everything seems to be going good after we meet and go on a date but once we pass the third month or so, BAM she hits me with it.
The girl seems to get comfortable with my wallet and are always asking me to buy this or that and they don’t stop with those puppy eyes either. I do talk finance with the ladies I date but sometimes I wonder if they just nod their head to make me happy or pretend to care about it.
I understand etiquette when dating but why on earth am I always paying for everything?
I’m a new veterinarian and it seems to get harder to find a woman who want me for me and not my bank account. The minute I say I’m a doctor I worry about whether they like me or my career. Yes, I earn a great living and yes I know it’s easy to blow it all and go broke.
Some of my guy friends tell me to shrug it off and that I have nothing to worry about financially BUT that’s not the case in question here. My concern is the future and how she spends money is important to me as my spending habits should be to her. I want to know that I have found a woman who is equally eager to save money for retirement, our children and stay debt free.
I’ve seen too many things happen as a vet where families come in and they can’t afford to care for their pet and they have good jobs. Just because people make good money doesn’t mean they don’t have to worry about how far they can stretch it. I still need to budget and I still need to keep an eye on what I am buying. I was frugal in university and although I do like the finer things in life I know how to spend money without going broke.
These women I seem to meet want to shop at all the high-end stores buying $500 purses and shoes galore. Sometimes I wonder if they are trying to impress me or think that I only date women who have the hottest look. I’m not that guy. I like a beautiful woman but that doesn’t mean she has to go broke ‘trying’ to be sexy. There is an allure about naturally sexy women and I appreciate that.
This one woman I recently dated told me that she was in debt $45,000 because of school loans and she just can’t stop buying all the new trendy fashion items. She studied fashion and because she was in the industry it was hard for her not to have what was hot on the market.
I had asked her what she thought about saving money, frugal living and living a debt free life. She laughed and said, “Not this Girl”. “I make good money so I’ll pay it off, it’s no big deal” as she took another sip of her drink and smiled. She went on to say, “You want me to look beautiful for you, don’t you?”
WHAT? I nearly spit my drink out but managed to swish it down with visions of seeing $0 in our marital bank account if we got married flash before my eyes. I was looking for the exit but the gentleman in me said that he would just enjoy the date and move on.
Why can’t I find any intelligent, sexy women who are not afraid to enjoy the simplicity of life? Let’s face it, I’m not a millionaire and it may be some time before I am but that still doesn’t change the way I feel about my potential partner.
I would love to find an independent woman who knows how to balance a budget, pay her credit cards in full and understands how important finance and love is with-in a relationship. I’m not trying to put money first here either. I can’t get my head around it and almost wonder if I will ever fall in love.
I just want a woman who I can love forever and who will love me back without thinking about what her next shopping purchase will be and booking all her beauty appointments.
How can I find a woman who compliments my heart and my passion for finance? Any help or advice is appreciated and thanks for having an outlet to chat about relationships on a personal finance blog.
Sexy women are everywhere
I’m amazed at how many people don’t want to get involved with people who have lots of debt or don’t know how to control their spending habits. On the other hand I’m not shocked because it’s 2015 and life is not getting any cheaper and with that comes a financial responsibility of looking after oneself.
On the other hand for some people debt is no big deal because if they love someone they will work on that debt together. I can understand that BUT my question would be is the reason for the debt under control?
If working out is part of the plan to find sexy women to date it will only get you so far in the dating world. If you have a juicy fat bank account or a high-rolling career you won’t have issues finding someone to date you.
YES, both men and women can be very greedy when it comes to finding a potential partner who has the money to keep them happy. Stay healthy because you want to look and feel good for yourself.
My wife has women friends who have been married and divorced and don’t care about love. All they want is to have a good time and as long as he has the cash they are going along for the ride. I’m not saying anything that the world already doesn’t know here.
Men are just as sly when they want something and don’t want to work to get it. I know a guy who liked to date older women because he says they have all the cash so he looks for sexy women that compliment him and his posh wannabe lifestyle. He would find them at the gym where he would workout and chat up all the ladies.
Some older women love younger, tanned men who have muscles like my friend who has never had an issue finding a woman. He’s now married to an older woman who takes care of him financially. In his eyes he’s scored a jackpot. We are all betting on how long this relationship will last.
I can see how revealing you are a doctor may motivate the wrong type of sexy women you are looking to date. Some women only date men who have high-profile jobs and you my friend are one of those men. If you are ready to crush the dating scene you need to know where to find your true love.
In all honesty, I don’t believe we should be hunting for true love. I believe that we will fall in love with the right person, at the right time in the right place. Call it fate if you will but it always seemed easier for me to leave love to the gods. I believe that we put too much emphasis on ‘finding’ rather than just living and being ourselves.
My advice to you is to just be you and to stop living day-to-day peddling to find love to fill your heart. If you continue to do so you will attract all the wrong sexy women that you don’t want. When you least expect it the right woman who has all the qualities you yearn for will come along.
If you don’t care for my advice you could also try online dating sites if that is something you are into. I always see advertising for “eHarmony Canada” on the television among the hundreds of websites online.
This may help to weed out the women you don’t want to date and showcase those sexy women you are looking for. There have been many successful marriages that have come from online dating sites but you always have to remember that if you try too hard you will never find who should truly stand next to you forever.
Don’t settle and if it feels right go with it and if finance is important to you then make sure you talk about it with-in the first couple of dates. Don’t waste time dating someone if you already know they aren’t right for you. I always had luck meeting women at the grocery store, sight-seeing, travelling or other community events.
Oh and yes long-distance relationships do work, I’m living proof of that. We’ve been married for almost 9 years now and love each other more and more every day. It’s all about communication and working together towards the same goals for us.
There are no right or wrong answers here doc because you are the only one who can find what you are looking for. Don’t give up on true love because it will find you and when it does you’ll know it. She will take your breath away.
What other tips do you have for Mr. Doc to help him draw in the sexy women he craves but with a passion for personal finance?
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