Finding your happy place in life has more to do with priorities rather than financial success.
Working from home for nearly two years now has allowed me much needed time to work on myself.
I’m the type of person who struggles to shut his brain off.
By this I mean, I often find that I’m thinking five steps ahead.
Can you relate?
If you do, I hope you enjoy what it means to find your happy place as I dive into deep waters.
I can be having a bath which is suggestive of a relaxed meditative form of time alone behind closed doors and still brainstorming.
When I started this blog I did so as a hobby which was great however now it’s turned into a business.
It’s said that if you do something you love without being paid you’ll be highly motivated.
However, if you start being rewarded for it then it becomes a job and your motivation decreases.
There will always be that next hurdle you need to jump to be better or better than someone else.
Makes sense doesn’t it?
Finding Your Happy Place
Yesterday I listened to a Spotify interview between Steven Barlett and one-fifth of the group One Direction, Liam Payne.
Both of these men are massively successful but far more diverse than what we think.
Two parts of the interview that caught my attention were his relationship with money and finding a happy place.
- When you wake up every day and it’s your dream life what do you strive for?
- What makes you happy?
From a young age, I wanted to be financially successful and happy doing something I love and getting paid for it.
That makes sense right?
I saved money working instead of going to the pub or buying a fancy car to buy my first flat.
I was 21 years old at the time and owned something that friend’s of mine only dreamed of.
My first car was a used 1982 Mark 1 Ford Fiesta for 500 Quid so under $1000 CAD.
I went on to sell the car two years later for the same amount I bought it for.
You have to give up something to get something and that’s often the sacrifices we all make.
Once I sold the flat I bought a semi-detached home which set the wheels rolling towards mortgage freedom.
Debt was something taboo for me as I didn’t want it apart from owing a mortgage and kept it that way.
Living a simple life back then and continuing to do so today with my wife contributes to our success.
Learning To Balance Work, Life and Happiness
Unfortunately, there are people who are working their dream job yet haven’t found that happy place.
I bet some of you who are reading this have no idea what truly makes you happy.
Often we think we do until we strip it down to the basics and forget about what everyone else is doing.
That’s because we are too damn focused on rewards, outside pressures and career demands.
Aside from enjoying time with friends and family, it’s important to find interests that cost you nothing.
That’s right, find things that are free to do that bring you joy, happiness and freedom from the cage.
Remove Financial Success From The Equation
Take away personal finance from your equation and what are you left with?
Setting goals is what we are taught to do because, in the end, you’ll find that happy place.
From there you move on to the next goal and so forth but when is enough is enough?
For example, we know that money doesn’t necessarily make people happy however priorities we set for ourselves revolve around personal success.
I have yet to meet someone that said their dream was to be financially unsuccessful, stressed, and riddled with debt.
Living A Life Without Comparison
Life has to be about growth along the paths that you set along with learning to respect yourself.
Failing to live in the moment and enjoying life for what it’s worth can be damaging to self-acceptance.
Am I good enough in the eyes of everyone around me opposed to am I in my happy place?
Money dominates daily living and as Payne states in the interview, “We’ve gone past the basic survival instinct. Making money has become the priority as we no longer hunt for food we hunt for success.”
How many of you work through your lunch hour or forget to eat because there’s too much to do?
This is what’s happening to society where success dominates taking care of our basic needs.
Skipping meals, lack of sleep, no exercise, reduced motivation, and fake smiles eventually will wear you down.
I’ve come to understand that if you allow your brain to live in the present moment you’ll get more done.
When your mind is busy worrying or trying to compete you fail to see where you need to grow.
For example, I’ve had readers tell me that they wish they were debt-free. Instead of learning from someone who lives debt-free they just continuing wishing.
I can lay out everything on a platter (pretty much what I’ve done) and it will be ignored.
Wishing gets you nowhere.
Believing in yourself, motivation, education balanced with finding your happy place is a good place to start.
Intrinsic Values Guide You To A Happy Place
Doing things without extrinsic value is so important to your health and well-being.
Extrinsic value means you’re doing something for rewards such as money, career progress, attention, or rewards.
When you tell your child to clean their room and they will get an allowance, this is extrinsic.
What is seen is the value that is given once the job is complete even though they don’t like doing it.
They are completing tasks for money and praise doing what they are told to do.
Intrinsic value is the complete opposite and that’s where it can be described as uniqueness.
Related: Extrinsic and Intrinsic Motivation– What’s The Difference?
Working at a job you love drives motivation from with-in and is considered intrinsic.
Finding ways to become an asset to a company is an intrinsic value because you are doing something you like.
Appreciating something or someone because you enjoy doing it is intrinsic.
There is no monetary value or extrinsic reward.
Finding My Happy Place In Life
It’s easier said than done trying to turn off your brain after work. If it’s not work taking brain space it’s home life that gets my attention.
Often times it’s both jumbled into lots of brain action and it wears me down.
No amount of organizational skills can take away worrying about the next five steps of your every move.
Yesterday, we were at the community garden watering our vegetables and both Mrs. CBB and I said it was relaxing.
It allowed us to get out of the house together, go for a walk, talk dirty about neighbourhood houses (you all do it), and do something we love.
There’s no monetary value in this as it’s not going to make us rich. I’m not selling you anything nor am I pulling the wool over your eyes.
What you read from me is what you get. No gimmicks, or miracle courses you need to pay for.
As we walked closer to our house a neighbour of ours had his headphones on and was off for a jog.
Jokingly we said to him that he was getting away from the family for some alone time.
Truthfully, he was and doing it for all the right reasons, mental health.
He told us that he runs every night to clear his mind and the music helps put him relax.
Things I Enjoy Doing Without Financial Rewards
Finding my happy place has certainly been a journey but one that will always evolve as I change.
Some of the things I enjoy doing that help me relax and be part of the moment begins outside.
Often time finding your happy place aside from being with friends and family means doing it alone.
This alone times allows you to work on shutting your brain off from anything not related to the moment.
- Going for a walk and exploring nature alone. (surprised me)
- Reading a book that I learn something from and finishing it.
- Working out with loud music.
- Gardening and taking care of our property.
- Watching the rain with a cup of coffee.
- People watching (I’m not a creep, really)
- Going for a drive
Those are just a handful of things that I enjoy doing that helps me plant seeds in my happy place.
The more you do what makes you happy allows you to grow and learn about who you really are.
I worry about nothing apart from the present moment and immersing my mind into it.
If you wake up every day living your dream it’s important to have something to strive for.
What Makes You Happy Often Is Not What You Thought
I’ve come to the conclusion that if people want to read what I have to say I’d rather them be here for the right reasons.
I’m in no competition to be the best finance blogger in Canada nor am I relying on this business to make me rich.
Taking something that was once fun for me and turning it into a money-making machine was never the goal.
However, I’ve learned that if readers come to me organically I’d rather stand on stage and get to know them as they learn about me/us.
If at the end that produces financial rewards that’s great but if not that’s fine too because the intention was never there.
Sometimes it’s easy to get lost in a pile of leaves looking for a golden ticket when all along your happy place lives within.
Discussion: How do you shut your brain off and do things alone that bring you to your happy place?
Share your thoughts below and thanks for reading CBB.