If You Need Wedding Donations You Can’t Afford To Get Married : The Saturday Weekend Review #238
DONATING MONEY IS GREAT-JUST DON’T BE TAKEN FOR A FOOL
Why oh why are some couples in such a rush to get married? I recently stumbled up a few wanted ads on a popular buy and sell group where someone was asking for wedding donations. Along with the request for cash this person offered an address so willing strangers could stop by with the cash.
Porch drop-off only I bet.
Money has many faces and for those who go looking for it without lifting a finger except for typing ‘Money Wanted Ads’ risk put themselves in danger when strangers are invited by to drop off cash.
Consider for a moment that this couple has money and doesn’t want to use it. They could be testing the online waters to see how many dummies are out there that would give them money.
This can be a horrible situation however so don’t put it past anyone to scoop up cash from generous people and for other reasons than what was explained. On the other hand the couple could legit be broke and in need of wedding donations so they can walk down the aisle with little to no debt.
If that’s the case, you’re not financially ready to get married yet.
Who came up with wedding donations anyways?
How cool would it be if you got married solely on wedding donations from strangers? Meh, you have to live with it, not me. If you honestly think that some stranger online is going to take time out of their day to pop around your place to drop off some of their hard-earned money you’ve got some serious financial problems you need to work through. Granted I’m sure there are a few donuts out there that have more money than brains. That or they easily fall prey to B.S and sob stories asking for funds unnecessarily.
Marriage is not about soliciting for wedding donations it is about a man and woman becoming husband and wife. Somewhere along the line this world has gone money mad asking for donations for just about everything. I get that it’s a great way to help people out but back in the day we just survived with whatever we could get from community organizations, working a second job and some form of financial planning.
This is the new-age of street begging gone viral. While I agree that there are plenty of people who tell the truth too many people are just trying to save a buck or get ‘rich quick’ fast. Rich could be anywhere from $1 to thousands of dollars for some people who have little to nothing. Go Fund me a popular website is like an ATM that spits out free money. Really, it’s your choice to donate but remember once it’s gone, it’s gone.
- My cat is sick and I need money
- I didn’t have insurance, my house burnt down and need money fast
- I lost my job and need money donations to feed my family
- My wife left me and emptied the bank account. Can anyone help?
- Sympathy stories that are way out there go on and on if you search online websites that cater to money donations.
This is how a frugal wedding goes down
Weddings have become a fad and unless we change our mindset that we are entitled to lavish weddings with even a bucket of coins we’re only asking for more financial trouble.
Friends of ours recently got married at City Hall with the Justice of the Peace. Since it was both their second marriages and with the debt of a new house and feeding many hungry mouths they went the frugal route. It may not be what they wanted but it turned out perfect for them. After the wedding the brides parents put on a huge Greek dinner for all the guests at their house outside and in the garage. It was decorated nicely from what we could see yet simple.
I say, smart on them.
Making Sense Of A Wedding Budget
You plan your wedding around the money you have saved and budgeted for. That’s it.
There’s nothing wrong with having a low-key frugal wedding like we did however we paid for our wedding from savings we had set aside over the years. Although we didn’t have a wedding budget due to the time-frame and situation with me living in the UK we had money in our savings account. There would be no way we’d ask for wedding donations just so we could call ourselves husband and wife.
It may be more than a piece of paper to some of you but there’s no rush to get married apart from certain situations where timing may mean the difference from seeing the person you love in person and not over Skype. Even then getting married just to see each other is a BAD idea. It has to be right and not send you into forever debt.
If you want a wedding that will cost money that you don’t have you must set up a wedding budget and fund it yourselves. Relying on parents, family members and complete strangers on the internet to fund your wedding is absurd. It’s your wedding. In some cultures, yes the wedding is paid but to ‘expect’ it is just silly.
Related: Did you go over-board on your wedding day?
When Mrs. CBB and I got married we spent around $1000. We did not have a lavish wedding at all, even our wedding flowers were home-grown and potted. The living-room was our church and the fire-place our ambience along with 12 or so guests to witness our joining of marriage. All decorations were either bought on discount or found at the second-hand shops. Wedding attire was from the second-hand shop for myself and Mrs. CBB bought a lovely dress from a department store. Our wedding reception was a buffet in a private room of a local restaurant.
Related: How to have the wedding of your dreams and still be frugal
The best damn wedding we could have asked for. It was simple, we remember it and there was little to no stress involved like a large traditional wedding. This was our choice even though most of my family couldn’t come to Canada to be a part of it. I’m almost certain it would be just as absurd if they asked me to fund their trip to participate in our wedding as it does asking for wedding donations.
Sometimes we have to do without because we can’t afford it.
Stop telling yourself that you will pay for it later too. O. M. G seriously think about your monthly budget, savings and goals. If you have debt up your arse and are just scraping by paying bills and rent then why on earth would you get married? You won’t pay back the wedding bills in a timely fashion and you know it. The costs for your wedding may seem frugal at the time but add in years of debt repayment with interest and you’re on a whole other level of special.
Think. About. Your. Money
We’ve already established that the best way to go about funding your wedding is to save the money yourself. If you have grand plans for a honeymoon ideally you’d want to set up a honeymoon budget as well. Instead of asking people to Go Fund My Wedding try finding other ways to save and be frugal.
Wedding Ideas to generate cash instead of gifts
Instead of having a wedding registry it is not uncommon for couples to set up a cash gift registry or ask for a cash wedding gift in the wedding invitations. Most couples would rather have the cash to put towards any wedding financial shortcomings from the final wedding bill.
The money could also be used to pay in part for a honeymoon but should never be expected. Always do what you need to do so you rely on nobody financially. Anything you get is a bonus then and you won’t be disappointed if you did get 2 or 3 toasters.
Another great way to raise money is by hosting a Buck and Doe but remember there are always fees you must pay up front such as hall rental (unless you have a place large enough) liquor licence, tickets, food and prizes. You don’t need to ask for donations for your stag and doe either although many businesses don’t mind the free advertising.
Related: Couple cancels wedding and spends $3000 made from Stag and Doe on debt repayment
If you plan to go that route approach people you know who have a business first and then see if they know anyone else that might be interested. This is more about networking then anything but never expect anything or for the wrong reasons. Other than advertising or family and friend prize donations that’s about as far as you should go.
Wedding help
Don’t be afraid to do a bit of homework when it comes to learning about weddings and finding out what you can and can’t afford. You likely won’t be hiring a wedding planner unless you know one who will do it for free. They don’t come cheap.
There’s nothing wrong with talking to other couples about their wedding wins and failures and most likely they will offer you plenty of tips. Be prepared to ask for wedding help and they will give it. Just remember that it’s your wedding and asking for money donations from strangers is a bit out there but it happens and sometimes for all the wrong reasons.
Step By Step.. that’s how marriages should go.
Getting married is a beautiful thing but once you wake up the next morning the bills will be there and life goes on. If you don’t want a debt-filled start to your marriage from your wedding expenses I suggest taking the time to save money first. Don’t ask strangers for wedding donations either, you don’t need it to get a piece of paper that says, “You’re Married”. Afford what your budget tells you that you can afford or hold off on the wedding until you’ve saved all that you need.
Imagine the freedom.
Discussion Questions: Would you ask complete strangers online to help pay for your wedding? Why or Why Not? Leave me a comment below and I’ll respond to it.
Mr.CBB
Another Week At The CBB House
I’ve been super busy this week Fall cleaning in and outside of the house. Besides sulking that my truck is too big to fit in the garage I did manage to clean it all out and rearrange my cabinets and work table for the better.
This past week we’ve been to a local pumpkin farm with our little guy which has become a family tradition for us. All I have to say is that he slept the entire ride home. He loves it! We picked up 2 pumpkins this year and 2 pumpkin pie pumpkins that will be made into something delicious.
BREAKING NEWS: We’ve decided to make a big financial decision that will take money away from us but we know it’s the right thing to do. Stay tuned for more on this as it unfolds.
We made pumpkin spice ice-cream this week and it turned out great and I’m not a huge pumpkin fan as it is.
I finally got the bunk beds set up, ordered all the bedding and necessities and made the beds. Our son loves the beds but does not wish to sleep in them just yet. We will likely be sleeping on the bottom bunk for a bit until he’s used to it. I’m not sure yet. I may have to do some research on this first. Any suggestions welcome.
Thanks for understanding my MIA for a bit but all is well now in the CBB family and extended family.
That’s all for this week,
Mr.CBB
CBB Published Posts
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Top Post This Week: How Much Should My Grocery Budget Be?
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Making a difference (MAD) 2017
Welcome to the 2017 Making A Difference series! Join the networking movement of Personal Finance Bloggers around the world.
If you are a personal finance blogger and would like your blog to be featured simply drop me an email. I’m currently booking November/December 2017-4 spots left. Don’t be shy get in contact with me today!
Hi Mr. CBB and Readers,
I’m Marc and I write The Side Gig Guru, a new personal finance blog that I started in 2017. I’m an ex-financial services guy who decided to get into doing side gigs as I was recovering from an accident and could not handle a full-time job.
Now you can follow my exploits pursuing various side gigs through the blog. Like Mr. CBB, I’m based in Canada, but I write for a global audience.
What is a side gig (or hustle)? A side gig or hustle is something you do to supplement your income or in lieu of a “regular” full-time job.
Examples of what I do include writing the blog, part-time system administration work, and dog walking. On the blog we cover a variety of side gigs including those you can do from home.
In addition to writing about side gigs and hustles, I also cover:
- General personal finance. I have over a decade of experience working in everywhere from a financial software company through to a stock broker-dealer and an investment fund. I feel I can put that knowledge to work for my reader’s.
- Frugality and minimalism. We will occasionally have posts on frugality and minimalism. I promise no meat loaf recipes, though.
- Real estate. I believe real estate can be one of the most powerful investment tools there is and I have a ton of experience that I’m slowly sharing with my readers. You can read the blog for details of how I made $800k through a 7-year real estate journey.
I look forwarding to welcoming the CBB readers!
Top Finance Weekly Read
I stumbled upon a post title at Freedom is Groovy that they were going to share 10 signs that we were financially kicking ass. Fair enough I thought so I gave the post a read.
It seems as if we are kicking some a$$ are you? Find out and let me know if there are areas you can improve on. Out of the entire list number 10 stuck out the most for me. I’ve learned during this debt free journey over the years is that simple is best as is family and work-life balance. I no longer want it all nor do I need a big house to live in with my family.
Brag Of The Week
Send me your brag to canadianbudgetbinder@yahoo.ca every brag whether posted on CBB or not gets an entry into a yearly draw for gift cards or cash!!! It’s that easy.
Hey Mr.CBB,
It’s a beautiful day but this late in the season there aren’t usually many garage sales. However, found several today.
- Two kids sweaters (gap and firefly), track pants (h&m), sandals, neck pillow, diapers $6 (asking was $8)
- Microphone $1 (asking was $2)
- Children’s large world map $1 (asking was $2)
- Roots sweater (ladies) $2 (asking was $5)
- New work gloves $2
- Herschel bags (3) – Free
Total spent $12
Thanks Jen P.
CBB Words of Wisdom
Top Chef Recipe Pick
Mrs. CBB and I are both huge soup fans and come winter we are always creating new flavours in the crock-pot or on the stove-top. The key to a heartwarming bowl of soup for us is flavour and filling.
A soup should eat like a meal unless of course you’d rather have it as an appetizer for a meal then keep it on the lighter side.
This Winter Detox Moroccan Sweet Potato Soup made by Marzia over at The Little Spice Jar looks right up my alley because it’s different and I enjoy all of the ingredients so why not put them together and see what magic can be made. I’m definitely going to make a pot of this soup.
DIY Weekly
Nicole and Bianca over at Cute DIY Projects takes home the top spot for Halloween crafts for these absolutely brilliant Mini Pumpkins made from tissue paper then stuffed with Halloween Treats. This is another project we may conquer this year or even next and I’ll bookmark it for a reminder. Well done.
Saturday Search Term Giggles
Always begin and end your day with a SMILE!- Mr.CBB
Every week I get tens of thousands of people visit Canadian Budget Binder because they did a search online and found my blog. (SIC) means I’ve copied the text exactly and it has spelling errors.
Most times funny, Sometimes serious.
- Ontario Store Scan Credit– Haha, this is a new one. This is The Scanning Code of Practice my friends.
- The impact of downsizing a house on teens– As long as you don’t downsize on top of them you’ll be fine. They will get over it. Life goes on. Just explain to them the reasons why.
- How to teach your husband a lesson about credit card debt– Dude, you’re in trouble mate. I hope you learn something.
That’s all the fun for this week, thanks for dropping by and we’ll see you all again next Saturday.
Mr.CBB
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Hey…if you see any mistakes let me know. I’m not an editor just a guy who likes to write and yes I make mistakes.
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